Heard at meetings and random thoughts

If you don't stand for something you will fall for anything.

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.

The only person you can ever be better than is the the person you were yesterday.

Happy New Year!

 

Listening and empathy

According to an article recently published in Scientific American (http://goo.gl/QgUn5) "Analysis of some 14,000 college student surveys over the last three decades finds that self-reported levels of empathy for others have decreased."  Fully 75% of college students scored themselves lower in empathy than students of 30 years ago.  
According to the article, "one possible explanation is social isolation—we tend to do more things on our own and engage in fewer group activities than we used to. Another possible cause is a decrease in reading fiction for pleasure. Studies have found that the number of stories preschoolers read correlates with their ability to understand other people’s emotional states."
Which brings me to one of the great benefits of meetings - especially speaker meetings.  Hearing other alcoholics stories and following the rule of 'identify, don't compare' helps us learn to feel how others feel.  This opens us up to ending our alcoholic isolation and learning to love.  It is yet another example of AA swimming against some of the negative currents in today's world.
Very nice.

Glad Gesthemene redux

I am reposting this note from earlier this year because I needed to reread it this morning and because I thought it might be a useful reminder to someone else in this season of joy and frustration. It may be especially useful during those family gatherings. As a member of my home group likes to say, all family reunions start out as Norman Rockwell and end up as Norman Bates.

Wishing and Willing

In Step 3 we decide to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understand him.  Most of us devote a lot of attention to the precise meanings of the word "God" in that sentence, point out the importance of the word "decide" and pretty much assume the words "will" and "lives" are understood.  This might be a serious oversight.

Heard at a meeting and random thoughts

We do not see things as they are.  We see things as we are.

If loving is like creating a child, forgiving is like raising someone from the dead.

Alcoholics don't need chaos in their lives; they demand it.

 

Meetings and meditation reinforce each other

The entire AA program is about personal transformation.  Soon after we enter the fellowship we realize that stopping drinking will never be enough; we have to become new people.  Going through the Steps gives us the solid framework for the transformation, but the transformation, the rewiring of our persons, only comes when it is hammered in through the repetition of meetings and the 10th, 11th, and 12th Steps.  Our trips through the Steps with our sponsors, at retreats, or in AWOLs tell us how we should view the world and behave, but that only becomes an ingrained part of us through repetition.  Spirituality has to become a habit and then grow into just how we are.

Unemployment lessons

I am unemployed and I hate it.  I knew I disliked it a lot, but I recently missed getting a job I could do very well and my reaction showed me that I hate being unemployed.  In fact,  I think I hate it a little too much or at least in the wrong way.  When I finally realized the potential employer was not going to call I felt like a desert wanderer who had been offered a compass and seen it snatched away.  I felt completely lost, unable to make any contribution to the world, of no use to anyone.  Obviously, I was trapped in the delusion that I am my work, that my work is my job and my worth is determined by that job and how other people value it.  Now that is a spiritual train wreck.

Heard at a meeting and random thoughts (quotes edition)

Silence is the language of God -- all else is poor translation. - Thomas Merton
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. - Gandhi
The most important question we must ask ourselves is, ‘Are we being good ancestors?’ - Jonas Salk